I have given up breastfeeding. I gave myself a few days to mourn but then told myself that I wasn't going to feel bad because in the end its about giving your child what she needs... nourishment. I breastfed for six months minus two weeks. I have had to supplement with formula since January because I just couldn't get myself back up to the amount she needed. I knew because sometimes she'd be fine but then late in the day I'd have to feed her hourly... or every 45 minutes. I pumped every two hours (even through the night) for weeks at a time hoping to cue my body into making more. I became resentful toward my body and irritated at my hungry baby. Thats never good. So, I fought the good fight and have bowed out gracefully. I will miss the ideal of breastfeeding, however I will not miss the actual breastfeeding experience that I had this time around. I feel like I was doomed the day I got sick, but I clung to it as long as I could.
No regrets. Moving on. Ameira is healthy and happy. She is plenty healthy based on her check-up today. She is EIGHTEEN POUNDS. My tubby baby girl. She is sitting up well, crawling, and trying to stand. I forgot how quick it goes once they realize they are mobile. Another plus? I saw the best sale I've ever seen on the sensitive formula today so I bought enough to get us through September. Ten dollars a can! I got a couple of weird looks from the cashier, but I've seen worse. Its enough of a savings to cover a large portion of my canning start-up costs.
And... will begin baby sign language with Ameira.