Thursday, January 7, 2010


I want a fast forward button.

October 23, Ameira was born. The end of the first week of November, she started screaming and didn't stop for a while. I came down with mono around November 15. I felt a little better about the 2nd week of December. Thats when Ry, Ace & Ameira all got colds. Babies are miserable and disgusting when they have colds. Just about the time everyone was over their cold, Ameira got her first ear infection. That was over the week of Christmas. The week after Christmas began Ace's Roseola and getting up way more than is healthy during the night... and my mono again which was worse. I just feel like we've had our fair share of sick so please go away.

I've had fevers all over the map and up to almost 104 for six days now. My throat is the craziest I've ever seen it and so sore. I literally can't do much besides lay around here and sleep.

I have finally asked for help. And holy crap, I got it.

I asked for meals from Monday--Thursday. I have received meals that will get us through next week Tuesday. And more people are trying to bring it, and I've actually said we'll hold off just yet. Friends have brought all kinds of goodies... not just meals. I've received chapstick, cookies, sweet breads, juice, popsicles, and even some Benadryl because I said I couldn't sleep. My sister called and told me the schedule that she has worked out with my mom to take the kids on every day that Ryan can't. She came and got the kids today. Ryan went to work. I'm all alone. That has not happened in a very, very long time. I'm kind of spooked by it.

You know what the kicker is? At 5:05, Bree called to tell me that Aayla woke up from her nap... with an eye infection. Its just an eye infection. Get a little meds, it'll be gone, no big deal. But its like someone grabbed out that pivotal Jenga piece in my brain and I just wanted to collapse. 5:05 is five minutes after the doctor's office closes. And you know what? They must have forgotten to turn their phones off because it just rings.... and rings... and rings... instead of going to their after hours emergency service. You want to make a girl crazy? Just play that stupid sound of no one answering for long periods of time. I guess I didn't realize how much I just expect voicemail to pick up. I just want to have them call in an antibiotic so that Aayla doesn't get Kirsten or Ameira infected... on the first day that someone else has my kids to be nice. It's okay. Breathe. Put it in perspective. I offered to come get her and drive her to urgent care to get a prescription that way, but Mom and Bree poo-pooed my suggestion. The only reason I was trying to call the emergency service was for them, so if they can wait, I most certainly can too. If I was healthy and she was home with me, I'm very much a "urgent care is for URGENT things" type of mother, so I wouldn't have brought her in. However, I was interpreting her having this eye infection to mean that she was going to be sent home so I could take care of her until she wasn't contagious. That was what sent me into panic. I could do it, but I can't say I'd do it very well... or gracefully. I'd probably end up sobbing the whole time. Did I mention I'm not feeling well?

So I put my Jenga tower back together again. I'm venting on my little bloggie-blog and will make my way back to the coziest spot Ryan set up for me on the couch. I will curl back up. Sleep a little. Nibble a little. Drink a little. And... get better as fast as I know how.

Ameira will just have to wait until we are all better for any sort of a schedule or consistency in her life.

1 comment:

Marissa said...

praying for you today! I'm glad you broke down and asked for help =)