Saturday morning Ryan left around 11. About a half hour after he closed the back door and drove down the driveway Ameira started screaming. Then, Aayla started crying and whining. Not a good jump start to home-alone-mommy. Aayla's nap time couldn't have come soon enough. Ameira went down shortly thereafter. I discovered Aayla awake in her bedroom closet about a half hour before she was supposed to be getting up. She hadn't slept a wink. She had stripped herself naked, attempted to pull down one of her dresses and managed to pull the entire closet bar down. She then shredded some of my home-made clothes size dividers (cardboard), found a bobbin full of thread that unwound and created a massive web with across the room, got on a pair of her "pretty shoes" (ripping the shoe organizer in the process but she did manage to get two matching shoes on the correct feet). She then had grabbed a shirt and got it on and over her head and one arm. She had a pair of pants pulled up around one leg. She was trying to put on a dress when I caught her. Boy did she smile really sweetly. Oh, and she also pooped on the floor. We got the room put back in order, poop cleaned up, toddler pottied correctly and put back in bed for the second try at the nap thing.
She was crying really hard but did not once mention that she needed a bite. Around dinnertime, after the failed second attempt at a nap, I realized I had not fed Aayla lunch. I suck. I sent her to bed about an hour and half earlier than normal and Aayla wasn't the wiser.
Ameira had been screaming at me the entire time she was awake and not eating. I was trying my best to be patient and not take it out on either of them. One wasn't doing it and the other doesn't know better. About the time that Aayla was almost down, she asked for more food. Of course I said yes, knowing she most likely didn't get in enough calories for the day. I was feeding her some cereal when Ameira woke and immediately went from snoring to screaming 100%. Aayla looked at me and I decided that just because one of my girls was louder it didn't mean that I had to neglect a just as pressing need from the quieter one. So... I sat there spooning in cereal to Aayla's mouth. Aayla looked up at me and said, "Ah-re-ra ka-why." (Ameira cry.) "I know, hunny, but right now thats just the way it has to be." "Ah-re-ra eed chu. A-ya wait. Mommy be why-t back." (Ameira need you. Aayla wait. Mommy be right back.) And I was so overwhelmed at how patient Aayla has been with me and this new creature we brought home from the hospital. I met Ameira's need and came "why-t back" to finish helping Ace. I love her and I love the way that God can push you to where you feel you're going to break but then give you a little reminder that he loves you and he's just making you stronger. I need to get a whole lot stronger.
Sunday we spent a few hours at my parent's house for Sunday dinner. I assumed Ry was coming home Monday morning, but somewhere along the way he decided that he's coming home Monday night after he hunts one more time. I decided not to make an issue out of it. I'm pretty sure if I said anything about it he'd say that was the plan the entire time. Sometimes we don't communicate well. Oh well. I got a six hour block out alone last week right? I also picked up a few library books to read while nursing. At least that is a bright side. I am not a newborn person. Praise the Lord the infant/newborn stage only lasts a few months. Praise the Lord for cherry coke and chai tea too.